GraveTalk 19: The Coronavirus & The Tories

Why are any of you surprised? I’m not!

Now I should really bring back The News: Highlights of the Week for this past week, with the amount of stories coming from the Conservatives alone. Yet, I think a GraveTalk may be best suited. The next one will be the nice, chilled out one I said on the North Korea GraveTalk, I haven’t forgotten – I just want to do this while everything’s fresh and in my head. So let’s begin…

Firstly off, I really don’t know why anyone is shocked or surprised by the actions of Boris Johnson in wake of Dominic Cummings. The best part was him cutting of the reporter asking about Cummings – he’s now controlling the media!  I’ve been saying this since last  year – in fact I did a GraveTalk election special. You all knew what he was like and yet people still voted for him. I just don’t much attention to them anymore, just catching certain little gems like ‘World beating test’ (More that later) and taking the piss out of them.

Let’s go back to the start of lock down. Forget the fact that nobbie was shaking hands with patients but when he made the lock-down announcement saying pubs need to close ‘as soon as possible’ – on a Friday evening? Think about that. Why didn’t he announce that on Thursday? Why did he allow pubs, restaurants cafes, etc… to open – people traveled to work, open up, customers turn up and then 5pm comes and they get told they have to close as soon as possible. Obviously, after opening up no pub was going to close early (unless they were dead) and customers weren’t just going to go straight home after putting the effort into getting ready to go out.

Now the UK like to act like they are acting on their data and making decisions based on that, however, they are just sheep. They are looking at what the rest of Europe are doing and then announcing the same, except changing some rules to be different – like the distancing. Most of Europe is 1m-1.5m but the UK went to 2m.

Social distancing will work to some extent but really it is pointless. Keep 2m apart, queue up to enter supermarkets, one person in the shop at a time – all of these prevention methods are all pointless if some has the virus. The best shops are the ones are the shops like Asda that make you queue, tell you to stay 2m apart and yet when you walk  around the shop people are just shopping as normal (Coming right next you because they want a lettuce!). It’s like the ‘world-beating test’. You take a test, you test positive and then you receive a phone asking for everyone you’ve been in contact with. If you’re in a shop, they can contact the staff and the shop will need to be closed, but what about the other customers? What about strangers you walk past in the street? People in the supermarket queues?  I think they need to come up with something else!

Iceland (The supermarket) is the only shop that hasn’t made customers queue up outside. They have put 2m markings on the floors, protected staff but not made people queue up and they have made the right decision. If you’re going to get it, you’re going to get it unless you cut yourself off from the rest of the world (Which isn’t going to happen). Sweden, made the right choice. They didn’t go into lock-down and they haven’t had it as bad as others. Germany would be worse, but they acted fast and look at them.

Let’s get back to Boris and the rest of the Conservative turds. After announcing the lock-down it was funny how one by one all of Boris and his close allies ‘came down’ with the virus. I used apostrophe marks because I wouldn’t put it past them to just claim they have it. I mean, Boris was on deaths door at one stage (Or as the press put it ‘In a really bad way’ in hospital) but he wasn’t put on a ventilator in intensive care (If you’re that bad, you’d be on a ventilator). Now if he wasn’t that bad why stick him in intensive care? Was it a publicity stunt? It was amazing how he left hospital on Easter Sunday – The second coming! This may sound heartless but I wasn’t arsed if he lived or died.

However, if he did die I would have been pissed if we got a public holiday and the pubs being all shut! I loved how Russia said earlier that day that Johnson would soon be on a ventilator and the government denied this then 2 hours later news broke about Johnson being admitted to hospital. People say Russia lie and are untrustworthy but the UK government blatantly denied Johnson was going to hospital only for him to do just that! Did Russia spoil their little publicity stunt?

Watching the daily government news I have noticed one thing. when they produce their presentations they keep saying ‘Next slide’. Don’t they know that PowerPoint offers automatic slide changes. They can even set the time for when the slide needs to change. Is this them being thick or do they just love dishing out the orders?

Throughout this coronavirus the government officials just look like a load of smug, useless, greedy lying bastards. That Matt Hancock is an evil little bastard, along with Priti Patel and Michael Gove. They have shown their true colours through out this pandemic.

Now for the cherry on top of the cake. Let’s talk about the Prime Minister’s Chief Advisor Dominic Cummings. Why is he even needed? He’s not an elected official nor is his position needed. He’s just basically a waste of space stealing a living.

What an absolute joke he is. Despite telling everyone to stay in and stay safe he decided to not only break the lock-down rules but the law – along with his wife! His wife had COVID-19 symptoms so instead of staying inside she went with the prick for a nice day out at a castle as well as visiting elderly relatives (Who we have been told are high-risk!) as well as stating he only went from London to Durham to (this bits the best) ‘test his eyes’. Now the law says that you a legally required to read a car licence plate from 20m. This link tells you about the DVLA rules on standards of vision for driving. This is a direct quote from their website You could be prosecuted if you drive without meeting the standards of vision for driving’. If he had problems with his eyes he should not have been driving. He not only put himself, his wife and kids at risk but other road users and pedestrians too. And the police aren’t that concerned. (Okay most of UK drivers probably don’t meet the eyesight requirements for driving, but that’s a story for a different time). 

The police and the government have changed their minds more times than Jordan changes husbands. First they say he did break lock-down rules (okay nothing about his eyesight and driving) and then they say he ‘may have’. His Conservative friends are divided, the ‘inner-circle of twats’ (Johnson’s lackeys) have contradicted themselves saying that he did to him not breaking rules. Some decent (Non-important) Conservatives have asked for him to resign. He hasn’t resigned and won’t because he’s a hard-faced prick. He, along with the rest of the Conservative twats, are a prime example of what is wrong with this country.

Boris Johnson know’s they messed up but still stands by him. The fact that he get’s flustered when asked about Cummingsgate proves he was in wrong, but the Conservative just want to cover it up and move on. I hope people now realise, what I’ve known for ages, that they are not fit to run the country!

Just before we finish, I would just like to point out why the hell a murder in America would cause protesting and demonstrations in the UK? people are saying it’s for black lives – No they’re just jumping on the bandwagon looking for an excuse to get out and break lock-down rules. It’s pathetic! Everyone gets treated the same – no matter what colour! They are classed as British, not African-British like in the US!

America has always had problem with racism but the UK is not like that and UK citizens know that too. Stop trying to make problems out of nothing – even the Americans are just using it as excuse to steal and cause trouble.

Thanks for reading. Things may have got a little bit sensitive at the end and you may not like it but I am right – just like I am right about the Conservatives. I hope you enjoyed this GraveTalk and the next one will be a lot happier! The next GraveTalk will be a list of the James Bond films – from my least favourite to my favourite!


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